08.Aug.2003

under the gun, as it were

--

okay.

Alright. Okay. I've read the e-mails. I've read the notes. I've received the packages in the mail. I've seen the two comments in my guestbook. I've unsuccessfully combated the instant messages.

I am updating again.

Things are seen with a clarity. Suffice it to say I'm content, and I'm very unapologetic about my limpid stream of all-encompassing contentment, also. Met up with old friends. Will possibly be moving in with them like it's the serene version of The Summer Before Last (romantic comedy unexpectedly not starring Jennifer Lopez). There is no more Catholic guilt. It gave way to Jewish ambivalence.

July was horribly disappointing. August is full of wonderful possibilities.

Suffice it to say I'm very, very content with my old friends and my terribly fascinating never here lifestyle. It feels wonderful to come out of the shell, to be productive, studying, experiencing, being all over town. It just feels as though I were terrified of basic human existence for no reason. It feels like I'm coming to life.

I hope you're all happy, now.

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time & machine